Divorced Twice…A Story about Redemption (be done with abusive relationships)

This is from a FB LIVE that I recorded in Jan 2019 and recently published on YOUTUBE

I re-watched the Single for 7 years episode to get an idea of what to say this week What has it been like to be divorced twice? Wow! Sounds pretty bad doesn’t it?  Well it’s defiantly interesting to say it apposed to go through it. I was like thinking this discussion may be a couple episodes at first and then I had an aha! My aha was that this needs to be the shortest cuz this is subject I don’t dwell in. It’s one I don’t feel shame in because they were two of my greatest lessons in life and also greatest gift because they lead me to my best life ever. They also were part of contributing to all my greatest s gifts of life…my children

 My very first husband and I were married when I was 20. Super young super nice man…it just didn’t work out. But I am so grateful to him he has helped me a lot in raising my daughter by totally trusting me to make right decisions and to back me up. He has met his soul mate who is such an amazing person and his soulmate has stepped up to the plate to be Raelyn’s step parent and his husband is certainly a man version of me. Love you Chucky! 

Second Husband —he’s a little tricky …learning to be very disconnected by his behaviors and I’ll talk a little about why at the end and maybe you’ll have suggestions for me put them in the comments….well he does that best he can and I in the last 2 years have learned to be ok with him where he is. I can’t make him be anyone or be a certain way….for example this man just does not know what compassion is nor does he ever want to be a nice person—I think the only thing I sometimes struggle with is when he still verbally abuses me. He has called me some form of fat from all weight sizes including when I was a size 2 lol last week he was mad at me because I wasn’t able to bring some of the kids toys and I responded saying sending my apologies and he responded saying….I can’t do things cuz I’m busy getting fat. Neither are true they are things he says in general and are boring and the  same things said over and over again used Try to make me  hurt. 

Sometimes those things have hurt me and I allowed them to but I choose to take his asshole words and make them funny by either laughing not responding or being complexly hilarious in text. Cuz I am hilarious and it makes me laugh to write comedy. Some people would say oh my god that would make me so mad I used to let it ruin my day.  And I don’t now. I live it simply and honestly I can’t wait for the day when those words don’t bother me at all cuz I know that I know…..I’m getting there. It’s all about recovery and healing and learning and growing.  I got this…and if there is something you have in your life that you can compare to this…you got this too! 

Got any ideas on how you handle ex being jerks? Put them in comments below 

 I have a lot of really great people letting me know how much my lives have helped them. I just wanna help people with what I’m doing here and where I’ve gotten today is partly to my detox I run weekly it’s free…link will be down below. 

Ok ok so now it’s time to end tonight and I always end these with an invite! I invite you to continue on in group called live inspired by wellness warrior within. I always put this link in the comments section. 

And as always asking for youtube subscribers 

I want to end one more thing…abuse is never ok nor is it funny I deal with his verbal abuse with comedy now…but it def is not funny it helps me do my thing and be me cuz there’s nothing anyone does about it. …my divorce from my second husband  has separated me from the ongoing every day abuse that I endured  and no one ever deserves to be in that place. If you are in that place my prayer is that you can find a safe place. Next week I’m actually gonna be talking about how I went from homeless abused wife with kids running to gain my life back  to the woman I am today. And how grateful I am to be in this wonderful place. Please join me next week. 

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